I can tell it’s happening when I feel hungry 1 hour after a delicious, satisfying meal.

I can tell when I am filled to the gills but am still aching for dessert.

I know even when I convince myself I don’t know what’s wrong.

I can feel it in my gut. Anxiety sure does feel a lot like hunger, but I know better. I know deep down in that unfindable place.

Something’s up. I’m not sure what. And I’m not sure how to fix it. So off to the kitchen I go.

Food gets more time in my life and more real estate in my house than anything else. Well, other than clothes and general clutter. I invest in cookbooks, food magazines, my pantry is always overstocked. But like an artist and their canvas, I like to feel prepared with the tools of my trade. I love the experience of food and how it infiltrates every part of our lives. We eat at least three times a day and not only do we eat to survive, we eat to connect, to entertain, to seduce.

I know that sometimes I hide behind it. This becomes more evident when I am going through a busy or exhausting or stressful time. When I’m nervous, I eat weird things. Wait, I should clarify that statement. Not weird, per se, but unhealthy and in weird combinations. I want to eat sweet, doughy, comforting foods. Add to that some salty, greasy, cheesy foods. We’re talking donuts, pizza, fizzy pop, chewy sour candies. CAKE. Cheese and crackers—less bad for you but equally as heavy and calorie laden. Just the thought of a salad when I’m in an anxious mood sends my digestive juices into a swirling frenzy.

I’d love to know if there is a scientific explanation for my cravings, and for cravings in general, but it’s probably just that I am attracted to foods that taste good and bring me comfort. No acidic fruit or veggies allowed! Not with those butterflies in my tummy.

For weeks now I have been awaiting the results of Tourism Richmond’s 365 Days of Dining Food Blogger promotion. Let me tell you, it’s been tough to be inspired by spring’s fresh and bright offerings during this exciting time. Bring me some street meat or a plate of fries smothered in gravy and ketchup—have you ever done that? The combo is fabulous!–or rice pudding–another preferred treat– sweet, milky, warm, filling and relaxing. Just what I’m missing when my nerves take over.

Rather than fight the cravings, when I’m really feeling out of sorts, I find it’s better to just go with it, and allow my feelings to run their course. So I bake. Not only does this result in a warm, cakey, soft place to fall, but just being in the kitchen and doing something that I love and can lose myself in does wonders for my psyche. I am concentrating on creaming the sugar and butter together, or expending nervous energy beating egg whites into frothy foam and for that moment I can forget all my troubles. By the time the dishes are cleared away and the wave of worry returns, I am smelling my sweet reward developing in the oven.

The silver lining through all of this? Occupying myself with a physical activity that I love, along with a warm piece of banana cake–with chocolate chips, of course–is usually just the medicine I need to get out of my funk. Plus my friends always love it because it means leftover cake for them to enjoy. Everybody wins!

How do your moods and feelings affect what you eat? What is your go-to feel better meal?

This recipe is an oldie but goodie-from a book called Company’s Coming. If you can get your hands on it, you’ve hit the jackpot–it’s filled with scone recipes, cakes and loafs, cheese straws and the list goes on. I found a copy of the banana bread recipe online here.